Some feelings...

John lay in bed listening to the sounds of his mates in the apartment getting ready for work. He knew he should get up, but couldn't see the point. What was there to do? "Cup of tea, John?" called out Paul, who was always the last to leave. "Please", said John.

"Got anything on today?" asked Paul as he handed over a steaming mug of tea. "Not really. Thought I'd go down the job club and see if anything new has come in. But I'm not very hopeful"."Don't give up, you've only been unemployed for some time. Something will turn up soon."

When everyone had left, the place seemed unnaturally quiet. This was the moment that John dreaded. It seemed as if he was the only person in the world who had no purpose. It was tempting to pull the covers up over his head and hide, but he didn't.

"Get going, move, make an effort. Today may be the one that changes your useless life", John muttered to himself as he banged about the flat. He did the washing up, which the others had left behind. Interesting that - that they'd started not bothering to do things around the apartment. Nobody said anything but John knew they all thought he'd get nothing to do so he'd jump at the chance to make himself useful.

Well, damn it, they were right. He did feel that by clearing up after them he was at least doing his bit in some way. But it still all seemed like a dream - or a nightmare. Why was he standing in the kitchen on a Monday morning when he should be discussing projects and technologies? That's what he was doing 6 months ago. John knew thinking about the past was the worst thing he could do.

It just got him down - or made him bitter. So he deliberately made himself hurry. He grabbed his backpack, made sure the phone was on - someone might call with an amazing offer - and left the apartment to face the world as seen through the eyes of the unemployed.

Why does the life have to be so diffilcult sometimes?